Table of Contents
Depression isn’t easy to manage. It’s not something you can just get over, and the next day you’ll be okay. There’s nothing anyone can do or say to pull someone out of their depression. It has to be the one who is going through the depression to decide, “I am done being depressed.” Depression is “A mental health disorder characterized by persistently depressed mood or loss of interest in activities, causing significant impairment in daily life.”
What Causes Depression
There are many causes of depression such as; loss of a job, the death of someone you loved, heartbreak, struggling in school, or just nothing in your life is going right. When we experience a significant change in our lives that affect us in a negative way usually, the first response is to shut down and isolate ourselves. The mood is so intense that it can change our mental state, forcing us not to care about anything except the psychological pain or neglect that we feel. This is where the loss of interest comes to play. Whatever significant change that has happened, in our mind, we unconsciously force ourselves to believe and think that’s the only thing that matters at that moment. We always think of the person, thing or situation as if we have control, but most of the time we don’t. Once the depression starts, if it’s not quickly addressed then it can prolong for a long time.
Signs Of Depression
Anyone can be depressed. No specific age or gender limits depression. Also, not everyone shows signs of depression because it’s not something that is talked about. Listed are symptoms I’ve noticed in family, friends, and fellow college peers.
- Unbalanced sleeping habits
- Unbalanced eating habits
- Not wanting to do anything
- Isolating self from people
- Forming or repeating addictions
- Falling behind in things that matter
- Lack of motivation
- Silent when normally talkative
- Separating themselves from the person who he or she once was
Stages Of Depression
Everyone’s stages of depression are different. A couple of months ago, I was depressed. Everything that I had worked for was falling apart. Family and friends know me as the “strong” “tough” and “confident” one so when things started hitting the fan, I separated myself from everyone. It didn’t help me that my family was in a different state as well. For a month, I isolated myself from the world. I didn’t; go outside, hang out with anyone, do my homework, talk to anyone, or engaged in anything that I would typically do. During my depression, I spent the majority of the time lying on the floor, crying out to God. After a good cry, I would binge-watch different shows on Netflix and search for quick ways to change my mood. I would either sleep too much or not at all. There were days I would eat junk food throughout the entire day, and then other days where I didn’t eat anything at all. Each day got gradually worse. I would scroll through social media, and barely respond my family’s or friend’s text messages or phone calls. I felt as if this was something I needed to deal with on my own. Although I was receiving encouraging text messages from my mother, nothing anyone said to me could make me feel better.
What To Do If You’re Depressed
When depressed the only thing to do (besides praying and releasing it all to God) is to embrace the emotion until you’re ready to get back to a daily routine. Because we are human, we should feel our emotions. It wouldn’t be healthy if we kept everything inside. Allowing yourself to embrace the feeling creates a healing process. The healing process will give you the spiritual strength to pick yourself up physically. After I decided I was done dwelling on my depression, little by little, I started my daily routine. I would clean my floor, and then the next day fold my clothes. I would never do too much at a time that could overwhelm me and make me want to get back in bed. I started cleaning because unconsciously, my mind was clearing as I was putting things away. Ever heard of not being able to think in a crowded area? I then talked to people that I trusted about what was going on to receive constructive criticism and sympathy. That way people could hold me accountable and help assist me.
You have to decide if you want to get out of your depression. No one can determine this for you. I didn’t wake up and decided to do better instantly. I chose to be better because life wasn’t going to stop for my trials. I had to determine if it was worth remaining in an unhealthy state. The more I continued isolated and depressed the more work I had to catch up on. I realized the quicker I applied my coping skills and received a good support system, the sooner I would be able to overcome it all. And so I spoke to people that I knew who would encourage me and help me get back to my daily routine.
It was a slow process, but each day I did something different and added something extra just to increase my progress in improving and moving forward. The mind is a powerful thing. So I forced myself to get better even when I didn’t feel like it. I forced myself to think positive and keep myself occupied with things or people I enjoyed. Yes, it was hard, but according to Philippians 4:13 “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” All I had to do was try my best.
How Can Family And Friends Help
If you’re a family member or a friend who knows someone who has depression, the best thing you can do is be a good support system. Don’t try to force them to do things that they don’t want to do. It isn’t your job to get them out of that state. They’ll have to want it for themselves. Also, be patient. Some people’s healing process may take longer than others. Always show encouragement and seek to understand to sympathize, not with your agenda. Checking on the person and asking what they need may also help as well.
To the depressed, choose to fight. You do not have to remain in that mental state forever. Yes, it will take stepping out of your comfort zone and possibly do things you’re not used to. Choose to write a list of all your issues/problems, then separate it into two groups of what you can control and what you cant control. For everything, you can control, make adjustments and create solutions. For everything you cant control, choose to let it go and move forward. Do a better job at taking care of yourself mentally, emotionally, physically, socially, and spiritually.