If you must question his love for you, or say to yourself ‘he doesn’t love me,’ then you probably shouldn’t be with him. There are various signs that males give to let females know they love them. Some are verbal, whereas others are through actions. Men are natural hunters. Therefore if they want something, they will go for it. A man who wants you, pursuing you, or already has you will put in enough effort for you to stay his. He will go specific lengths in confessing his love for you and make plans for spending your lives together.
Some men also have a hard time expressing their feelings which is okay, but he will never leave you confused about what he wants or needs. Below I listed 12 common indicators to know if he doesn’t love you. To get a full understanding if he loves you, ask him how he shows his love for a significant other.
1. HE DOESN’T INVITE YOU
If he doesn’t involve you in his everyday life, he probably doesn’t love you. When someone loves you, they want to spend every day with you. Sharing a common interest will bring him closer to you. He would include you in his plans, invite you to hang out with the people he hangs out with, and would want to get to know the people you hang with. He would let you know his whereabouts and would want to know yours. Not being obsessive, but showing consideration of wanting to share a life with you. If he’s not including you in things that are important to him, that’s a sign.
2. HE DOESN’T RESPECT YOUR FEELINGS
Does he consider your thoughts and feelings? When you are communicating about anything, he should be actively listening and trying to help assist the situation if needed. Everything that you say shouldn’t be ignored. You should be valued every day of your life. If you’re doing little things for him, such as chores or making dinner, he should show you his appreciation. To show appreciation is to recognize someone’s good deeds, and not take advantage of it. There shouldn’t be any feelings of dismissal when voicing one’s perspective.
3. HE ISN’T HIMSELF
Is he a different person with you than he is with his family or friends? He should be showing the same amount of love and affection or more when he’s with you. His attitude shouldn’t be standoffish. There should be a balance in his personality. He should be constant and persistent only changing for the better. If something has changed, he will make sure you know it.
4. HE’S ALWAYS APOLOGIZING
How many times has he said sorry for the same behavior? There’s a difference between saying sorry and making a mistake. If a mistake is made the purpose is to make sure and to try his best that it doesn’t happen again. Making the same mistake continually is now considered a habit. And our habits become our lifestyle. We are all in control of our actions and words. By allowing him to continue to say sorry gives him the unconscious thought that his behavior will always be forgiven. Yes, you should forgive those who have done wrong to you, but also know when to walk away. You shouldn’t have to keep reminding him to do right by you.
5. HE DOESN’T MAKE TIME FOR YOU
It’s a different story if he’s busy and communicates that with you but to never make time for you is an issue. I’m not saying he should spend every moment with you. The importance of spending time is enjoying each other’s presence and learning new information about each other. If he is never available, then why be with him? Any man who is interested or loves you will make the time for you, even if it’s two minutes or 20 minutes.
6. HE CHEATS ON YOU
If he is cheating on you, he doesn’t love you. He isn’t ready for commitment. Cheating doesn’t always have to be physical it can be small as forming an emotional attachment to someone else. If he’s cheating, he is not capable of being in a committed relationship. If there are any issues within a relationship, there should be a discussion about what is wrong rather than allowing little mishaps to build on top of each other, therefore creating childish behaviors.
7. HE LIES TO YOU
Anyone who lies to you, shouldn’t be trusted. You cannot form a trusting relationship built on lies. You don’t want to continually have to wonder if he’s lying to you or not. Even if the truth hurts, feelings get hurt, or the relationship might end he should always be honest in every circumstance. If he is continually lying, he may be hiding something from you.
8. HE DISRESPECTS YOU
He shouldn’t be disrespecting you in any aspect; physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually and verbally. There shouldn’t be any cursing. Even when upset there shouldn’t be any verbal abuse, that would result in making you cry or hurt your feelings intentionally.
9. HE HITS YOU
No man should ever put his hand on a woman in an aggressive or threatening or intimidating way. Even if it was an accident and he says he’ll never do it again. It shouldn’t have happened in the first place. He needs to do a better job at controlling his emotions and actions. And just because a man shouldn’t hit a woman, the woman shouldn’t offend or put her hands on him either. If a relationship ever becomes physical, you should leave immediately. Love is not supposed to hurt.
10. HE HIDES STUFF FROM YOU
Keeping secrets is a sign of distrust. Information that is deemed as essential or has affected one or both people should be shared. Hiding anything that can hinder the relationship is not okay. He should want to share everything that involves you and his relationship.
11. HE HASN’T TOLD YOU HE LOVES YOU
If he hasn’t told you he loves you, while showing his love for you, he probably doesn’t. Now some men don’t or have a hard time at showing affection. But to never show love or express it could mean the feelings between you two aren’t mutual. Our beliefs should always be shared with one another.
12. HE DOESN’T SUPPORT YOU
Having a support system is essential because we’re not supposed to do everything alone. He should be encouraging you to follow your dreams, continue with work, and whatever else you want to pursue. Showing support is influencing positive behaviors and being present in any way (physically, mentally, emotionally, financially, or spiritually) in any situation.